Ode to armpit hair

A different blog post to be sure, but no less important than any of my posts of the past few months. About six weeks ago I was having dinner with two friends both of whom I have an incredible amount of regard for as they make no apologies for who they are or what they believe in. One is a Sociologist who studies gender and sexuality, and the other a physical geographer by training she now explores the gender bias in the natural sciences. Needless to say our conversation was rich and very intellectually stimulating. Our topics of choice were not world politics or the philosophy of life, but something far closer to our hearts - gender, sexuality and women's ability to 'be'. I have spent years trying to figure out what this idea of 'be' means, and I am sure I will spend many more continuing to be confronted by barriers to my ability to 'be'. That Friday night dinner shifted something in me as I digested the many topics we had brought to the table to share. I have for the past eight months begun to see a large part of my ability to 'be' as being linked to my ability to be ok with just being me and accepting others as just being themselves too. It is not that this single evening or set of conversations changed my thinking radically, it was just another step in shaking off of years of invisible binds around body image. It is the inadequacy teenage girls feel when suddenly it is expected of them to remove all their body hair because it is 'unattractive'. I was 27 years old before I could admit out-loud to a friend that I had hairs on my chin, and I was 40 years old before I could admit to myself that I hated shaving my armpits and always have. For years I have been so hard on myself for having body hair - it seems so ridiculous now that I see it in writing but that is the truth. So six weeks ago I said enough is enough and embraced the freedom of no rash under my arms and the difficult maneuvering necessary to reach the awkward angle with a razor. It has been an interesting process which involved asking two men whom I am close to in different ways their thoughts, and of course they rightly say, 'great that's your choice'. Decent human beings, whether they are male or female, will not and should not dictate what you do with your own body. This weekend I took my armpit hair out to meet the world by wearing a sleeveless top and a dress, and it was strange at first but I realized it was more my own awareness rather than anyone else. I am not advocating that all women stop shaving, my point is that no one should tell you how to express yourself through your physical form. I love shaving my legs, I love getting my eyebrows threaded, I love wearing dresses and fancy shoes - but these are choices I make about my body. But to the armpit hair I say welcome and let us go forth and bare ourselves to the world and smile.